


Wildflower

by YumeNoHoshi



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Drinking, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Minor Lee Jeno/Mark Lee, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn, college party, lots of swearing, mild anxiety attack, renjun is really sweet with everyone but hyuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-12
Updated: 2021-02-12
Packaged: 2021-03-16 20:20:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,183
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28587897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YumeNoHoshi/pseuds/YumeNoHoshi
Summary: All donghyuck wanted was to pass his math class, but one incident later made him wonder if he’d make it out alive.(and it didn’t help that the cause of said incident was awfully attractive)
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Lee Donghyuck | Haechan
Comments: 13
Kudos: 80
Collections: Love Dream 2020





	1. Sal (pero aún te quiero)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [jinnieshyun (angelsouls)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelsouls/gifts).



> Hi!! 
> 
> First of all, a big shout out to the mods Cony and Robin for making this fest happen! I had so much fun participating. It wasn't easy, but it's finally here! 
> 
> To Shreya: hope you like it :] <3 !!!
> 
> To my friends Dani, Shel, and Carly: Thank you for the constant boost of confidence when I felt like giving up and for the last-minute beta-ing.
> 
> Without further ado, enjoy!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's crazy how fast a cup of coffee can give Donghyuck's life a 180.
> 
> [Chapter's playlist](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0WLpV83vEIdCuOQQCL6bOV?si=OTwFOxhoRCCALu0ERx4RGA)

Donghyuck had ten minutes until his class started as he ran through the school parking lot. His backpack was hanging from a shoulder, a cup of lukewarm coffee in one hand, and the keys of Jeno’s car in the other. A thin layer of sweat had covered his forehead. _‘I knew I shouldn’t have ignored the fucking alarm the second time it rang.’_

Last period’s classes had just finished and students were gathering in the hallways, blocking Donghyuck to hurry through them. He stood on his tiptoes, knowing he wouldn’t make it on time if he waited for the crowd to dissipate. With a frustrated sigh, Donghyuck messily grabbed the strap of his backpack, adjusted it, and used the bag like some kind of shield to shove some people out of the way — mumbled half-hearted apologies thrown behind him. 

Even in those situations, he was raised to a polite kid; she’d be proud to see him right now. Well, maybe only a little, as he could imagine her nagging about his video game hobby (read: obsession) interrupting his schedule or his impulsive decision on bleaching his hair blonde. He figured he should call home soon and assure his family that he’s still alive and not eating a lot of takeouts as promised. Maybe if he talked about Jeno first, it would distract her a little (Donghyuck’s mother treated his roommate like her own son at this point).

He walked rapidly while placing his bag back on his shoulder once again and thought about millions of excuses for his future talk with his mother and her imminent nagging. As he did so, Donghyuck didn’t notice a slim figure going towards his direction until it was too late — one loud scream and a high-pitched curse later, to be exact.

“What the _fuck is wrong with you!?”_

Once he had recovered from the shock, Donghyuck saw the aftermath of the encounter: a random guy — probably around the same age as him — was on the floor, butt solid on the concrete while staring at him with a confused-yet-furious gaze. Scattered brown droplets were across his chin and cheeks. Several books scattered all over the ground, and a big coffee stain on the boy’s sweater.

_‘That’s not a good sign.’_

“Let me help you,” said Donghyuck as he walked over to where the guy’s books had flown to, not minding leaving his own things behind. He glanced up and noticed that it was just the two of them in the lot.

“It’s the least you can fucking do.”

After the man stood up and cleaned the dust on his hands off with his pair of light-wash jeans, he studied the stain on his sweater in defeat. Donghyuck stood awkwardly in front of him. 

As Donghyuck tried to find the right way to apologize, the other — whose brown hair stuck to his forehead because of the coffee residue — closed his eyes and seemed to be summoning all of his willpower and patience to not snap. Donghyuck couldn’t blame him, it would piss him too if some distracted asshole tossed coffee on him. Maybe it was a good idea to not mention he was running late to class. 

Seeing the other stayed silent and slightly shivering — Donghyuck hoped it resulted from being cold and not rage — he undid the knot of the hoodie wrapped around his waist and extended it to the stranger. “You can use this instead. I would assume you don’t want to smell like hellish coffee for the rest of the day?”

The guy noticed the hoodie and then looked at Donghyuck; his eyes were deep brown with a small spark in them. With a sigh, the brunette took the hoodie and his books from Donghyuck. He then started searching the area, most likely to find a restroom, ignoring the puzzled look Donghyuck threw his way. Once he had spotted one, he passed Donghyuck, who quickly picked up his own things and made a beeline for the guy. 

“Now tell me, why are you following me?”

“To get your name and a major, hopefully. You know, to have my hoodie back so I won’t have to buy another one.” Donghyuck couldn’t see the other’s face, but he knew the other had rolled his eyes at the comment.

“Fine, creep.”

Once they reached the restroom, the stranger dropped his stuff in one corner and locked himself into a stall. There was no way the professor would allow Donghyuck to get into the class anyway, so he took his phone and shot Sungchan a brief message — he begged the taller to not fall asleep in class and to write decent notes for him. The sound of the lock echoed through the empty room, the brunette emerging from the stall.

Donghyuck had to admit the stranger looked cute, even if he was practically swimming in the hoodie — the piece of cloth was plain black, but somehow made the other shine. The blond had purposely bought a bigger size to be warm and cozy. Math wasn’t adding up in Donghyuck’s mind; maybe he needed to lower his daily caffeine doses. 

“Hey,” The brunette called to Donghyuck after clearing his throat. Donghyuck wasn’t aware how much time he had just spent staring at the other, but the guy didn’t seem pleased. “I’m Renjun, I’m a junior in biochem. Happy now? I need to see if I can ask for notes or something.”

“But how can I—”

“That’s not my problem.” Renjun stuffed his tainted sweater in his backpack, adjusting it on his shoulder, and picked his stuff up from the floor; the heavy books loaded in one arm. He looked Donghyuck dead in the eye. “Next time try not to run over other people and try to burn them.”

“It wasn’t even that hot!” ‘ _Nice one, Donghyuck_.’ He mentally slapped himself.

With that, Renjun scoffed and walked out, leaving Donghyuck coffee-less and with an oncoming headache inside a restroom on the other side of campus. One that was on the direct _opposite_ side of campus.

♨ 

After that incident, Donghyuck bought a thermos and took it everywhere he went. It didn’t matter if his friends made fun of him; it was better to be safe and sound. Also, they couldn’t blame him though: it was environmentally friendly and the vase had a pretty flower at the front.

But, just to be sure, today Donghyuck walked to the campus with just a bottle of water, kept deep inside his backpack.

“Dude, I can’t believe you took differential equations this semester,” said Yangyang while sipping his coffee, looking at Donghyuck all judgemental. “do you want to, like, die or something?”

To be honest, Donghyuck wasn’t trying to set himself up for misery this early in his college life, but he needed to catch up on some classes he skipped last semester after enrolling in the most GenEd classes he could. He did it to improve his GPA and impress his parents, who would _hopefully_ let him move out of the dorms to live with Jeno, and somehow it worked. But now, he had to actually _take_ all those complicated classes he had skimmed over while making his plan. Of course, Donghyuck did not feel ready. Hell, he only got the minimal passing grade for Calculus II.

He was royally fucked.

“It isn’t completely my fault because you _ditched me_ last minute, _dickhead.”_

Yangyang just shrugged and took another sip of his iced coffee. “I wanted to be stressed as little as possible this semester. Besides, I’m more than okay with having Material Science with Miss Joohyun.”

“Doctor Bae to you.”

He rolled his eyes, “Whatever.”

The two friends reached the engineering building with a few spare minutes until Donghyuck’s class started. Yangang peaked into the classroom. “Damn, there aren’t many people in here.”

“Was that supposed to be encouraging?” grumbled Donghyuck. He got a bit irritated by his friend’s remarks, but he somewhere along the way had gotten used to them. Who would have expected this devil would be all shy smiles and soft-spoken during the first semester and yet turned into whatever the fuck _this_ was. Donghyuck was sure he’ll never know what the fuck happened.

“Don’t be grumpy, man. I heard some friends are also taking this class, so you can stick with them worse comes to worst. Be friends with Yeri, she’s the real G.O.A.T in math and all that fun stuff.”

He couldn’t find it in himself to argue Yangyang; not when the boy had that enormous smile on his face. Donghyuck was weak for his friends, sue him. Instead, he just smiled back and thanked his friend for dropping by before the other disappeared to look for his classroom. Donghyuck found an empty table next to the window where the curtains were opened; he could see some trees and blooming flowers.

Donghyuck sighed as he sat down. 

He did love the campus. It was worth working his ass off back in high school to get this scholarship, even if that meant having to be independent for the first time in his life. It scared him; having to leave the familiarity of where he had grown up, but it was something he had to do to chase his dream major at one of the most renowned universities in the country. 

Donghyuck knew that if he had landed a spot in such a difficult scholarship program, he could easily ace this equations class.

No. He was _sure_ he could. 

“Oh, you have _got_ to be kidding me,” groaned Donghyuck. The _guy_ appeared in _Donghyuck’s_ class, like a _fucking_ cliché. Donghyuck knew needed to keep his head cool, but the imminent heat of embarrassment reached his cheeks.

“Hey there,” The other man responded. He didn’t outright ignore Donghyuck, which was a good start, but there was still a hint of coldness in his tone. “You don’t have any coffee with you now, right?”

“No, not right now. But Renjeon—”

_“Renjun.”_

“Yes, _Renjun_.” Donghyuck gulped while passing a hand through his bleached locks. He wasn’t usually bad with names, but this guy made Donghyuck screw everything up. “Look, I just wanted to apologize again for not watching where I was walking.”

Renjun crossed his arms, an unreadable expression forming on his face.

“— And for spilling coffee all over you.”

The other’s previously unreadable expression morphed into a wry look, but he kept silent. Donghyuck got even more nervous. He couldn’t say anything in response as the professor entered the classroom and started the lecture. Renjun walked to a seat at the front, next to a girl Donghyuck assumed the other man knew.

Donghyuck chewed on the inside of his cheek while his mind wandered. His focus went from paying attention to numbers and their weird concept to the brunette who sat two rows in front of him.

Donghyuck shook those thoughts away and turned his focus on the blackboard.

♨

Three weeks had passed, and Donghyuck was _not_ pleased. Somewhere along the way, he had discovered that this course required much more of his attention than any of his other classes. It wasn’t that difficult, per se, but when everyone got the same result, he would always end up getting it wrong entirely. No matter the exercise. It was getting very frustrating.

“Ok guys, I already checked your first batch of homework,” the professor started. Donghyuck’s leg started bouncing in anticipation. “And most of you seemed to understand how ordinary differential equations work, alongside the different methods we’ve learned since. Consider today’s class a gift; you will correct your homework in pairs for some extra marks for the end of the term.”

Varying cheers echoed throughout the room.

“I’ll make some suggestions for extra points but it’s up to you whether or not you take it, so don’t worry.”

‘This professor is godsent,’ Donghyuck thought with a smile.

Unfortunately, his happiness lasted no more than three seconds after seeing Renjun walking from his seat at the front to sit next to Donghyuck. His leg immediately stopped bouncing.

They both started to work at their own pace in peace, as Donghyuck thought about how he was going to make it out of class without embarrassing himself or getting too worked up by the other’s irksome attitude. 

“You’re wrong.”

To Donghyuck’s dismay, there was no way Renjun would leave him alone. Donghyuck turned to the brunette. “Excuse me?”

He looked down at Donghyuck’s paper with indifference. “I won’t do the correction for you, I’m just saying you got it wrong.”

“No shit, Sherlock.” Donghyuck laughed dryly, an undertone of irritation with his words. “I can see the big ass mark on my homework, but thank you very much for your service, _Renjun._ ”

“Oh, _now_ you can remember names?!” exclaimed Renjun, a fake expression of surprise. Donghyuck wished there was a nonviolent way to erase that smug look off from the brunette’s face. He took the nearest pencil and started chewing on it to stop himself from saying stupid things he would regret later.

He took the nearest pencil and started chewing on it to stop himself from saying anything stupid that he would regret later. 

Renjun chuckled at Donghyuck’s childish antics, but the latter ignored him for the sake of keeping peace in the classroom. Even though he could feel his patience wearing thin.

“Try doing—”

“I think I got it, Renjun,” interrupted Donghyuck in the calmest tone he could summon. The result was still giving him zero.

It definitely frustrated Donghyuck. He knew Renjun continued talking and trying to show him something, but Donghyuck tuned him out. 

“No, that’s not how— Donghyuck, are you even _listening_?”

“Not at all,” Donghyuck replied.

“Okay, fine,” said Renjun while standing up. There were at least 10 minutes left of class, but he didn’t seem to care. “Do whatever the fuck you want, smartass. I don’t need those extra marks anyway.”

And then he disappeared.

  
  
  


“You're acting like a child oh my god.” Yangyang looked physically pained when Donghyuck told him about what had happened only hours ago. 

“I second that!”

“Nobody asked you, Lele.”

The latter just snorted and went back to whatever he was doing on his computer. 

Yangyang turned back to the dry erase easel in front of him, black marker in hand. “But how are you that bad with these equations? You were practically god in precalc and calculus I.”

“I don’t know either, to be honest,” confessed Donghyuck, taking a sip of his americano. He had already had a mental breakdown while trying to solve the guide the professor sent, resulting in him calling Yangyang at 10 pm. He was a broke college student, of course he wouldn’t pay for Chegg’s answer sheet.

And as for Chenle, Donghyuck honestly couldn’t remember when the younger had arrived.

“Look man, I can try to help because it really is just algebra, but if you’re having any more problems, you’re better off calling Yeri or one of your sister’s friends. I’m pretty sure Doyoung wouldn’t mind.” It was clear that Yangyang tried to sound annoyed, but he kept his voice soft which Donghyuck would be eternally grateful for. 

Midterms season was fast approaching and driving everyone crazy, but Yangyang still made time for the blonde. Donghyuck started to wonder how it is that he ended up with such an amazing friend. 

“Thanks, Yang.”

They were halfway through trying to figure out how to set out the result of an exercise. Both Donghyuck and Yangyang had snatched another dry erase board from other tables to write the rest of the equation (with some additional doodles, courtesy of an easily-distracted Yangyang) until they eventually got stuck.

After staring at the boards in front of them in hopes for the problem to solve by itself, Donghyuck took his backpack and left to buy a few snacks from a nearby vending machine, sneaking them into the library without the librarian noticing. Donghyuck was starting to get some of his energy back.

Once he got back into the third floor, the first thing he found was Renjun with an eraser in hand as he wiped off the area where Donghyuck’s work had been. His friends were nowhere in sight. 

All he saw was red.

“Now tell me what the fuck do you think you’re doing?” Donghyuck tried to whisper, but it came out much louder and colder than he intended; he winced at his own tone. Renjun whipped his head towards the blonde, a frown taking over his features. 

“I’m here to help Yangyang,” he placed the eraser on the table with a loud smack, eyes never leaving Donghyuck’s at any moment. “What are _you_ doing here?”

“I’m the one whose work you just erased.” He took long strides towards Renjun and snatched the marker from the shorter man in one quick movement. Renjun scoffed and crossed his arms, tilting his chin up while fuming at Donghyuck.

He tsked, “I figured as much.” A shit-eating grin was growing behind his tightly closed lips. “Yangyang told me he struggles with math, but there was absolutely _no way_ he could be this bad at basic algebra,” Renjun _chuckled,_ “I should have known it was yours.”

Before either of them had the chance to say anything else, Yangyang returned. “Both of you calm down for fuck’s sake, I could hear your bickering from the restroom.”

“Don’t worry Yang, we’re cool,” said Renjun, tone turning ten times sweeter than before. Donghyuck was too focused on trying not to rip off Renjun’s head to notice. “He just wants to kiss me so badly, that’s all.”

Donghyuck blinked. “ _What?!”_

Renjun snickered, clearly enjoying Donghyuck’s reaction. He said his goodbyes to Yangyang before Donghyuck could reply, his silhouette disappearing as he walked down the stairs of the library. 

Yangyang cackled at Donghyuck’s flustered state for a solid minute after the encounter. They looked back at the boards just to find the problem they had struggled with now solved in way fewer steps than before.

♨

“Guys, do you think I’m a bad person?”

Jeno walked out of the kitchenette while whipping his hands clean with a towel, with his eyebrows knit together. “ _What_ are you talking about, Hyuck?”

Donghyuck passed a hand over his blonde hair and looked at his roommate slash best friend with exhaustion. With a sigh, he got up from the couch and paced across the room. Jeno waited until he gathered his thoughts and spoke.

“Why do you think Renjun hates me?”

His sudden question seemed to surprise the taller man, making him stay in silence for what felt like hours. If Donghyuck was being honest, he really couldn’t blame the other. He had talked to Jeno about their tense encounters throughout the entirety of the semester, even if the latter stayed silent during his rants. Donghyuck knew deep down that Jeno had analyzed the situation way better than him.

“Well, for _starters_ , you spilled coffee all over his sweater and caused him to skip a class,” Jeno explained as he leaned against the kitchen island. There was a lightness in his tone, Donghyuck became engulfed with his friend’s attempts to lift his mood. “You also bickered with him during class and snapped at him when he was trying to help. _All in the same day._ Yangyang even said he had to tell you guys to calm down.”

Donghyuck chewed on the inside of his cheek. _‘Damn Jeno and his love for gossip and always being right.’_

“Besides, he is actually a really good person,” joined Jaemin. He was at the dining table with his computer and some discarded notes. He tended to spend way more time in Donghyuck’s apartment than in his own dorm, but the blonde couldn’t be mad at him for it; dorms were a nightmare. “He even helped do my part of a group project when I had to go to the clinic. Oh! He gave me your hoodie, by the way, but it’s in Jeno’s car.”

“Wait, didn’t he present the project and get your team full marks?” added Jeno. He looked at Donghyuck with genuine surprise. “Jaemin told me he speaks with a really soft tone that wins over everyone’s hearts.”

It started to become clear that Renjun was sweet with everyone _except_ Donghyuck. Great.

Not that it _bothered_ him, of course not. He was just curious if the brunette was that aggressive with anyone else or if it was just Donghyuck. The blonde was a STEM major, and doing some research was just the natural thing to do when something didn’t make sense.

“Stop sulking over your crush and help us with this party,” Jaemin said as he clapped his hands, his report long forgotten. 

Donghyuck chose to ignore the first part. “Wait, that’s _this_ weekend?”

“No way, you forgot?”

“Mark has been talking about this for the past month, Hyuck,” Jeno whined.

“Yes, Hyuckie, we’re having it on Friday. Jeno’s boy has been talking to practically everyone he knows to get this massive mess ready,” Jaemin commented, grinning while looking at Jeno. The blonde didn’t miss how his best friend got flustered at Jaemin’s comment.

“He’s not my boy, Jaemin...”

Speaking of the devil, there was a sudden knock at the front door, shutting down the discussion completely. Jeno bolted to the entrance to let Mark in and, well, Donghyuck just couldn’t ignore how whipped his friend was for the older man; his eyes went into crescents and his lips donned a small smile while the other talked to Jaemin about the party, completely oblivious. Jeno was _so_ cute and so into his crush that it made Donghyuck smile.

A picture of a certain brunette popped into Donghyuck’s mind, and he quickly dismissed that thought. Because _‘what the fuck was that?’_

♨

“Hyuck! You ready?” Jeno shouted. Donghyuck was looking at himself in his full-body mirror. He cast one last glance at himself and knew he was ready to go.

Donghyuck left his room and walked into the living room where Jaemin and Mark already were. They were playing on Donghyuck’s switch while drinking some cans of beer to get in the mood before the real deal. The two were playing Mario Kart and Jaemin was crushing Mark, painfully. Even for someone as uncompetitive as Jaemin, winning a switch game was a matter of honor, and losing to Mark of all people was _especially_ not an option. 

Jeno was standing next to the couch when he noticed Donghyuck’s presence and greeted him with a wolf-whistle. Donghyuck grinned at the gesture. 

“Wow, Hyuckie, you’ve outdone yourself this time,” praised Jaemin, pausing the game to get a full view of Donghyuck himself.

“Yeah, are you tryna do something tonight?” said Mark as he wiggled his eyebrows and smirked. He looked kind of ridiculous, but Donghyuck felt his confidence get boosted high to tease the older.

Donghyuck had his hair styled, a middle part sectioning off his blonde locks and leaving the ends to curl up at the end. His outfit consisted of a black bomber jacket decorated with colorful flowers covering a beige undershirt — it gave the illusion of him being shirtless. A pair of black skinny jeans with an accented chain laying across his left hip clung to his well-built legs and led down to his gray converse He was wearing makeup, a light foundation on his tan skin covering a few acne scars while brown eyeshadow dusted his lids, accentuating his eyes pop along with delicate eyeliner. A cherry red lip tint, and golden highlight feathered across his high cheekbones complete his look for the night. 

“Nah, I just wanna dance, have some drinks, and let loose,” he explained while trying to put on a silver necklace, matching a bracelet on his wrist. Jaemin saw him struggle with it and stood up to help Donghyuck with an amused expression. Donghyuck continued. “Besides, Jeno has a lab practice tomorrow; we can’t leave late. And I plan on sleeping on my bed, thank you very much.”

Jaemin finished securing the necklace around Donghyuck’s neck and walked over to the couch once again. He looked Donghyuck up and down, “To me, it sure _looks_ like you’re trying to impress someone.”

Donghyuck tsked as he grabbed his wallet from the coffee table, Mark still playing on his own. The elder complained about Donghyuck blocking his sight, causing him to fall off the track and lose the race. “Don’t be ridiculous, Nana.”

After finishing a few more beers at the department, the crew jumped into Jeno’s old and kind of rusty Chevy and drove to the party. Jeno was the self-proclaimed D.D. for the night and promised to make sure they all made it home safely; especially his crush who had an incredibly low alcohol tolerance. They all arrived at the address a mutual friend named Shotaro had texted Donghyuck a few days prior. 

The place was packed. College students stood outside, waiting to enter the garden party with a ticket on hand. Donghyuck noted that Mark’s friends really outdid themselves with the organization and promotion. He could bet most of the campus knew about this party.

They exited the car and quickly made their way to the venue entrance. Two upperclassmen were checking the tickets, Donghyuck recognizing them as Yuta and Taeyong, both looking intimidating enough to manage the sea of people. As soon as they got close enough, Taeyong recognized the group and let them pass through, not before throwing a winking at Donghyuck.

“You’re lucky you look like a total snack right now or else I would have made you wait in line for at least half an hour.” He gave a playful slap to Donghyuck’s ass and smirked. “Have fun!”

Even though it was only nine pm, people were already dancing and playing those extreme games to get shit-faced drunk while the party’s special playlist blasted through huge speakers. With light steps, Donghyuck walked to where one of Mark’s friends, Hendery, was serving the drinks.

“What can I get you tonight, Hyuck?” asked the older, Donghyuck not missing the way Hendery was blatantly checking him out. Oh boy, there went Donghyuck’s ego again. 

“Are we getting classy with the drinks tonight?”

“Well, we are college students so there isn’t much of a variety, to be honest.” He shrugged, a smirk never leaving his lips. “But we’ve got tequila, vodka, rum, and some cheap beer.”

Donghyuck propped one elbow up on the counter while resting his face in his palm, giving him an uninterested and cool aura, but never missing the eye-contact with the pink-haired. Hendery licked his lips. “Maybe give me your personal recommendation?”

Hendery handed him a _paloma_ with far more tequila than soda. It mixed with the previous beers he drunk, making the blonde feel light-headed and flimsy. Donghyuck walked to the dance floor, seeing his friends trying to talk over the loud song that another upperclassman played over to spice up the party.

“Hyuck!” Mark called to him, a hand clutched at Jeno’s shoulder for support. The latter just shook his head and placed an arm around Mark’s waist. “Here, come meet DJ!”

A guy to Mark’s right smiled at the slurred speech that left Mark’s mouth, seemingly unbothered by it. He looked at Donghyuck and lifted a thick eyebrow; Donghyuck started to seriously consider duplicating this outfit in the future with how many people checked him out.

“I’m Dejun, or DJ as Mark calls me,” the other man said. He went closer to Donghyuck and whispered in his ear, “Although you can call me whatever you want.”

‘That was old as _fuck_.’ Donghyuck thought. Then again, he wanted to have fun, and flirting with a cute guy wasn’t a bad way to start the night. Dejun backed up shortly to give Donghyuck some space and looked at him, expectant. _‘Oh shit, was I supposed to answer that?’_

“Just call me Hyuck and we’ll see if I call you boo by the end of the night.”

 _‘That was a good one._ ’ The blonde mentally patted himself on the shoulder. The cute boy looked like he wasn’t expecting that response, judging by the redness tinting his ears. He flexed his arms while looking anywhere but at Donghyuck. Dejun had a sleeveless tank top while carrying his leather jacket on his arm. The top loose on his torso, giving an invitation for everyone to look. Donghyuck unconsciously placed his thumb on his lips.

“Are you done eye-fucking Dejun now, Donghyuck?”

Donghyuck looked up and a playful smile grew on his lips.

“Jealous, Huang?”

“Not at all,” Renjun said while he took a sip from his red coup. Donghyuck became ten times aware of how hot he looked as the brunette checked him out with a smirk adorning his lips. “I’m not the one with a questionable reputation during parties.”

Donghyuck walked closer to Renjun and spoke low enough for only the two of them to hear, “I’m not bothered by all those things.” Now it was the blonde’s turn to sip on his tequila. “But it would seem you’ve been keeping an eye on me, babe.”

The delight Donghyuck felt when Renjun became a flustered mess and stuttered over his own words was beyond satisfactory; a battle won.

But the war was not over.

Donghyuck took a step back to really look at Renjun and, _fuck_. The brunette’s hair was styled up, but leaving a single strand of hair falling over his forehead. He was wearing green contact lenses that made his eyes look bigger and they contrasted the light rose-golden eyeshadow over his lids. He was wearing a white jacket with an animal print shirt underneath — a combination that Donghyuck would normally consider odd, but Renjun was able to pull it off flawlessly. He had even left a few buttons of his shirt undone, showing a silver chain adorning his collarbones. Renjun looked fierce and _fucking hot._

The blonde’s felt his throat go dry as Renjun walked away, looking for more alcohol and passing Donghyuck as he did. He placed his hand on Donghyuck’s shoulder and gave him a fleeting and light squeeze.

  
  


Music continued to blast at full volume. The party grew bigger with bodies dancing, singing, and drinking as if their lives depended on it. Maybe it did. Exams were approaching soon, and that was a perfect escape; an ideal place where time froze and all responsibilities were thrown out the window. A night of partying with their friends and letting loose. In Donghyuck’s opinion, those were the things that made college life interesting and exciting. 

That year, the theme was neon lights and neon paints. A friend of Donghyuck’s — Ten — helped paint fake freckles over Donghyuck’s face, neck, and down to his collarbones, all in vibrant neon colors. He felt like a star, glowing so bright under the night sky. 

With a fresh drink in hand, Donghyuck had let the alcohol in his veins take control of his body and lose himself to dance. His sight blurred a bit, and he couldn’t talk without laughing, but he was still lucid enough to find Renjun. He pulled the brunette away from his friends while the other just smirked and bit his lip — it was coated up with neon red color.

Renjun got closer, neither of them thinking it was even possible. The only thing Donghyuck could feel was the brunette’s frame against his own, his hands burning with the desire to touch. Renjun backed up a few centimeters; just enough for Donghyuck to read his lips that were reciting lyrics from the song currently playing. 

_Who needs to go to sleep, when I got you next to me._

Donghyuck downed the remaining vodka in his cup in one shot. Renjun laughed at the blonde’s antics, a feeling of deja vu taking over the latter. The brunette placed his hands on Donghyuck's shoulders and continued dancing — swaying his hips. It drove Donghyuck crazy.

His world went haywire when one of Renjun’s feverish hands found his neck and brushed over the specks of paint on it. He brought their faces together and met in a messy kiss. The taste of booze and the eagerness running through their veins made the occurrence _unforgettable._

Donghyuck was on cloud nine as they kept kissing, a seemingly endless dream. He slipped a hand into one of Renjun’s back pockets, the brunette responding positively as they continued to kiss. 

Under the light of the moon, the night continued.

After hours spent under the constant cloud of cigarette smoke and cheap vodka that lingered in the garden, Jeno’s car was calming. Donghyuck’s head kept spinning, and the neon paint smudged all over his face had started to itch. 

“Sorry man, I’ll have to turn on the AC with all the fog,” Jeno mumbled with a raspy voice; he sounded tired. White letters written across the console told Donghyuck that it was almost two in the morning. He nodded, folding his limbs into a ball to protect himself from the cold feeling of the passenger’s seat after buckling his seatbelt. 

The car’s engine started, the gentle purr lulling the blonde to close his eyes and drift off. Jeno threw something at Donghyuck to use as a blanket before pulling out of the parking lot for the night. 

Aside from the drastic temperature change, a faint scent came from the unknown cloth that made Donghyuck remember a certain someone he had spent a majority of the night with. The corner of his lip lifted once he recognized what had been thrown over him. 

When they reached a red light, Donghyuck used his last ounce of strength and consciousness to shimmy out of and discard his own jacket, throwing it somewhere into the back seat. He pulled the clean hoodie over himself and crossed his arms to keep the warmth from leaving his body. 

If Jeno saw him bury his nose in the hoodie to smell Renjun’s cologne mixed with fabric softener, he didn’t say anything.


	2. Just needed company

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Donghyuck felt like giving up, but luckily for him, Renjun wouldn't allow that to happen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Chapter's playlist](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/44tjUpOk8cUDfvX2iCDuEm?si=v6V-926HRlWa_ZPvWTmb-Q)

For Donghyuck, entering the library wasn't supposed to drain him. He used to be here in his free time at the beginning of freshman year when he barely met people from his major; sitting alone reading some papers or watching random youtube videos. It was a lonely year, Donghyuck won’t let himself lie. Thankfully, once the third semester rolled around, he met his friends, and life has been easier since then.

It was supposed to be his safe place.

After crossing the glass door, to Donghyuck’s surprise, the place was nearly empty. It wasn't finals week yet, but midterms finished a couple of days prior, so Donghyuck had expected to see at least three occupied tables — preparing for recovery exams as their last chance for not to fail. Just like him.

Donghyuck _did_ try his best, though. After the much-needed distress method, (aka the party) he then realized those extra points he got in the previous term wouldn't be enough to pass the class. This made Donghyuck go to the maths department looking for academic counseling a couple of times. 

Fortunately, he got better. But it still wasn't enough.

With a sigh, he walked to a table at the corner of the floor, far from the main staircase. The second floor of the library was for students to be in complete silence, so it was easier for Donghyuck to dive into his notes, listening to music, and focus completely.

After a while, Donghyuck observed the objects on his table: the notes he took during the semester were spread all over the place in an attempt to classify them by dates, a textbook that was heavier than all his notebooks and computer combined, a big ass thermos filled with coffee, and some pens. If anyone could see him, they would think he was a dedicated student; a role model.

If only they knew he was one step closer to failing his class, his opportunity to continue pursuing his major at stake. Donghyuck let out a humorless chuckle.

"Hey."

Donghyuck took one earphone off and raised his head to see above his computer specs, bleached locks covering half of his view. A familiar silhouette awkwardly stood across the table. "Can I sit here?"

Donghyuck felt his brows knit together out of habit. The place was nearly empty, there was no reason for Renjun to be at Donghyuck’s table — especially after his week-long radio silence — but the blonde wasn't in the right state of mind to discuss, so he gave a curt nod and made room for Renjun. 

Renjun mumbled a quick ‘thanks’ and sat across from Donghyuck, eyes never leaving the floor. The atmosphere had changed — it was tense, and that made Donghyuck uneasy. He knew things between them weren't particularly good, but that didn't explain why Renjun was being so cautious around him. They would bicker until one of them got tired and then leave. That was their dynamic — not whatever _this_ was. ‘ _Maybe it had to do with something that happened at the party_ ,’ Donghyuck thought. He had to ask Jeno about the details later.

Slowly, Renjun took out his stuff from a small backpack. His hands were slightly trembling, and Donghyuck saw him blink several times. He was about to comment on it when Renjun abruptly let his backpack hit the floor; the fall was muffled thanks to the carpet.

"Hyuck?" mumbled Renjun, looking at him. The sudden eye contact took Donghyuck by surprise, but he just raised one eyebrow, allowing the brunette to continue.

"I'm sorry."

_Huh?_

"Pardon?" 

Renjun took a deep breath, closing his eyes momentarily. Donghyuck swore he could see a pale pink tint on the other's cheeks.

"I was being a dick the other day... I should've waited for Yangyang before erasing anything on the whiteboard." Donghyuck saw him scratch one of his sideburns, struggling to continue. "But I guess my nerd-self couldn't bear to see a simple exercise done _so_ wrongly, you know? I couldn’t just leave it like that."

Donghyuck raised both of his eyebrows in surprise. ‘ _Is Renjun being serious?’_ A couple of seconds later, Donghyuck saw how Renjun’s own words stung him, making the latter groan. Renjun covered his face in embarrassment. 

Apologies weren't Renjun’s forte, Donghyuck discovered, but somehow it didn't bother him. He found it endearing to see how frustrated Renjun could get when he wasn't all-mighty and confident. A smile started to bloom at the corner of his lips.

"Don't laugh," warned the other, sensing how Donghyuck was enjoying watching Renjun make a fool of himself. "This is harder than I thought."

"Renjun," Donghyuck started, a chuckle left his lips. He pulled out his earphones and looked directly at an offended and flustered Renjun. "Don't worry about it, ok? It was also my fault — the way I snapped. I know you meant no wrong."

Renjun blinked a couple of times and then laughed. Hard. Donghyuck didn't get the joke but seeing the brunette laugh wholeheartedly made him cackle. Both guys were laughing their lungs off until a girl from the other side of the floor stormed angrily towards their table, threatening to call the guard to kick them out.

After that, the tension dissipated, and they smiled at each other. Donghyuck was about to continue working when he spotted Renjun picking up his backpack, walking silently across the table to sit next to him. Donghyuck couldn't stop the smile that was pulling on his lips. Unaware of his reaction, Renjun moved closer to Donghyuck to read his notebook. 

Donghyuck watched as the brunette quickly scanned his progress on the striped piece of paper, pointing to a specific step. "In here you can use parameters instead of the annihilator method. It's easier and you'll get the same result."

Donghyuck felt something warm spread in his chest with the other's closeness and the faint smell of fresh laundry and cologne — refreshing and spicy, with an undertone of tangerine — but he immediately dismissed it. He hummed in agreement and erased what Renjun pointed out. He was looking for the proper method to use in his textbook when Renjun placed a perfectly made table on top of his notes. It was a cheat sheet. Donghyuck looked at Renjun, who smiled at him.

"I've been studying too, so this might help you."

They continued studying in silence, but it wasn’t awkward anymore. Renjun was studying for the microbiology test he was having that week, so he was rereading his notes in a whisper, which Donghyuck noticed. He also noticed Renjun usually pressed his lips into a thin line and puffed his cheeks out in frustration when he couldn't understand something. On top of that, Donghyuck noticed how the two huge textbooks could easily cover most of Renjun’s face — actually, all of his tiny self. Of course, Donghyuck appreciated the peace they had, and he didn't want to have one of those monster-sized books smashed on his cheek, so he kept quiet and looked for another exercise on his laptop.

Hours had passed, and the sky outside became pitch black. Donghyuck didn't have any idea how much time had passed, but one thing was sure: he was _starving._ Still in his chair, Donghyuck stretched his long limbs until some popping sounds were heard; he moaned in relief. That seemed to alert Renjun, as he almost gave himself whiplash at the speed in which he turned in Donghyuck's direction. 

Amused, Donghyuck raised an eyebrow and tilted his head in question. Renjun stared back at him with wide eyes. 

"What?" The brunette asked defensively at Donghyuck.

Now Donghyuck was certain Renjun was blushing.

"Nothing," smirked Donghyuck. ' _That was interesting_.' "I'm just tired and really hungry. Wanna grab something from the convenience store?"

Renjun looked at him for a couple of seconds and cleared his throat. "Sure. I had dinner before coming here, but a snack never hurt anybody."

Both guys grabbed their wallets; Donghyuck took his thermos and left the library. It was already autumn; the wind came and went in strong gusts and nights became colder, that day not being an exception. Once crossing the glass doors, Donghyuck noticed when Renjun dug his hands in the pockets of his thin sweater. 

Suddenly, he wanted to hold Renjun's icy hands.

Once inside, Donghyuck greeted the cashier as they filled his green container with coffee, and Renjun roamed through the cramped store. The latter went for some cookies and iced coffee from Starbucks, shrugging at Donghyuck when he asked why. 

“It helps me stay awake.”

They paid and left, looking for a bench nearby.

The campus was silent. Tall trees cast huge shadows under the headlights as the leaves moved with the slow pace of the wind; the fountain shut off and the classroom lights were off. ' _It should be around 9 pm now.'_ Donghyuck grabbed the thermos with both hands and exhaled. A white fog appeared in front of him.

The blonde turned to Renjun. He seemed lost in thought — hands laced together to maintain warmth as he breathed hot air onto them. Donghyuck couldn’t hold himself from blurting his own thoughts out loud. "Why are you helping me?"

It took several seconds for Renjun to understand the question. Donghyuck could see realization change the brunette’s features from a small frown to a soft smile, hiding behind his hands; sharp edges fizzling away. The cold was piercing Donghyuck’s skin, but his eyes remained on Renjun. 

Renjun’s profile shone under the moonlight, his presence addicting — taking Donghyuck’s breath away for a second.

"I don't know," Renjun started, while turning to face Donghyuck. The shadows cast on the brunette, changing the lightning surrounding his hair, giving him a sort of halo. Donghyuck's heart skipped a beat. “But I think we should start over. A second chance after all of that madness, maybe?”

Renjun extended his hand to Donghyuck. "I'm Renjun, nice to meet you."

Donghyuck grabbed the other's hand.

"I’m Donghyuck, and the pleasure is mine." He squeezed Renjun's hand, freezing compared to the warmth of his. A gust of wind hit them, making Donghyuck shiver. "We should go inside, we can't get sick when the semester's almost over."

And if they walked back to the library, with both of their hands locked inside of Donghyuck's jacket pocket — with the excuse of the night being cold — neither of them said a thing. 

Not even when Donghyuck caressed Renjun’s palm with his thumb.

♨ 

"You don't have to do this, Renjun," spoke Donghyuck, a bit gently, but his tone still laced with distress. They were walking towards the social science building, passing the pond and the cafeteria.

"After tutoring your ass for days, coming with you is the least I can do." Renjun smiled. After a few steps, the blonde snuck a few glances towards the other while he was distracted — Donghyuck saw the smile plastered on Renjun’s lips, and the constant scoff Donghyuck was used to was nowhere to be seen. That odd sensation inside of Donghyuck's stomach was back, stronger than ever.

Once they arrived at the classroom on the first floor, they saw that a few students were already there. Donghyuck and Renjun sat near the windows, far from the front row. Familiarity calmed Donghyuck’s nerves a bit when he saw some trees outdoors.

Outside, the sunset began to paint the campus different shades of orange and red as the sky turned into a royal blue. Donghyuck turned to his left and placed his head in the palm of his hand; a few clouds appeared above the window frame while the evening changed into night. One cloud ambled along, hue darkening from red to purple.

"Hyuck?" asked Renjun from the blonde's right, barely saying his name out loud. The nickname sounded foreign to Donghyuck's ears, but it was gentle — wrapping him with calmness. Donghyuck turned in Renjun's direction and came across with a pair of hazel-colored eyes staring back at him. Even if they _were_ full of worry and anticipation, Donghyuck found himself relaxing. He smiled, a little less stiff.

"I'm fine," he assured Renjun. The brunette wasn't fully convinced but dropped the topic regardless — which Donghyuck was thankful for. Making it as if the last minutes didn't happen, they talked about everything and nothing until the once-empty classroom had the remaining students inside.

Donghyuck's heart stopped when he spotted the professor walking into the classroom. A bunch of papers under his arm and a grim expression plastered on his face.

"I think it's time for me to go." Renjun slowly stood up, not making too much noise to not being noticed. Donghyuck realized he didn't want the other to leave; Donghyuck felt anxious and vulnerable just with that thought. Almost immediately Renjun noted the shift in Donghyuck's demeanor, deciding to hold the blonde's hand in reassurance. "You're gonna ace it, Hyuck. Trust me on this one. I'll be waiting for you down at the cafeteria, text me when you're done."

With that, Renjun gave Donghyuck's hand a final squeeze and left the room. The professor started giving some explanations, but all Donghyuck could hear was his rapid heartbeat while his ears felt as if they were stuffed with cotton. Donghyuck closed his eyes and took a deep breath; air filling his lungs and leaving them with a shaky exhale. His heart rate slightly decreased, but his hands still quivered. Donghyuck was trying so hard to ignore intrusive thoughts but was too much. He found a hang-nail and started biting on it until someone placed a copy of the exam on his desk.

"Ok guys, you may start now."

  
  


Donghyuck couldn’t remember exactly what happened.

He did remember staring at his exam, trying to understand what he had to do even if his head was spinning. His hands were clammy while holding his half solved exam. The class was dismissed, and Donghyuck couldn't do anything besides handling the piece of paper, earning him a disappointed look from the professor. Once outside Donghyuck could get his classmates were discussing an exercise but it was all white noise to him.

With trembly hands, Donghyuck managed to text Renjun he was done. He was on auto-pilot at that moment. His legs took him out of the room and continued walking all the way down the campus until Donghyuck was at his apartment's hall, not sparing one last glance behind. The blonde arrived at his own room, collapsing over the bed with a puff.

Donghyuck felt his head lighter than usual. Too preoccupied with calming his dreading nerves, Donghyuck now remembered he hadn't eaten ever since before his exam. It didn't matter anyway, because the weight of his lids stopped him from going to the kitchenette and find some leftovers to eat.

He felt his phone vibrating from the inside of his jeans' pocket, but all Donghyuck wanted was to sleep. He took the device out, along with his keys and wallet, and dropped them on the floor.

Donghyuck closed his eyes and gave into Morpheus' mercy.

♨ 

A beam of sunlight entered through the window, reaching directly to Donghyuck’s right cheek; the increase of heat forced him to wake up. Disoriented and with slightly swollen eyes, the blonde found himself at his own bed.

Muscle memory had brought him back home safely.

Still wearing the clothes from the previous day, Donghyuck sat on the edge of his bed, with an oncoming headache. He blonde rubbed his eyes in an attempt to try to get rid of the tiredness. After blinking away the remaining weariness, Donghyuck looked for his cellphone, just to find it dead on the floor.

It didn't matter if he received the email or not; Donghyuck knew he had failed the course.

He reached the point where he didn’t have a clue what to do next.

He felt lost.

Not wanting to feel worse, Donghyuck decided to take a shower; at least the clammy sensation on his skin would leave his body. He hoped for some of the guilt to go away too.

Once done, Donghyuck took out some aromatic candles he bought back from his home in Jeju. He lightened them one by one while his phone charged back to life. When the white screen appeared, Donghyuck unlocked the device, squinting while typing his passcode. He went directly to the music app and played his favorite playlist, ignoring the missing calls and several texts.

Engulfed by the slow beat and the soft scent of sea moist and saltwater with a pinch of a citric essence, Donghyuck hugged himself in solace. It reminded him of his favorite memories from back home; how carefree he used to be during the summers before college, running under the blistering sun while the seawater caressed his feet on the beach.

Donghyuck took a deep breath, a feeling of deja vu taking over him, but the familiar sensation wasn't enough to suppress the burning sensation growing behind his eyes. He tried to detach himself from the intrusive thoughts dreading his mind, but with no luck whatsoever. How would Donghyuck be able to tell his family that he, the one who had always accepted challenges and had excelled them with a blinding smile, just failed? How would they take the news? Will they force him to go back to his town and give up on his dream?

It was too much. His breathing became erratic instead of slow and composed. Donghyuck sat down again on the mattress; the once calming scent started suffocating him. The blonde placed his hands over his forehead, covering the blooming frown whilst trying to make all those scenarios disappear. He was out of breath, and a thin layer of sweat covered his forehead.

A faint knock on the door took Donghyuck aback.

He blinked in confusion. All dozed off and still shaky, Donghyuck stood up from the mattress. He didn’t understand who could be outside. He tried to recall compromises he might have done or any project he had to do, but nothing came to his mind. It was Saturday and Jeno told him he will be out on a date with Mark.

There were another series of knocks, more persistent than the previous one. Donghyuck went to the door and slowly turned the knob.

“Renjun, what are you doing here?” 

When Donghyuck had opened the door, he expected anyone but Renjun to be there, smiling softly; radiating too much fondness, making his eyes seem to be extra sparkly. Before he could say something else, the brunette leaned on the wooden frame.

"Jaemin texted me. He told me Jeno found you on your bed when he arrived at the apartment." Renjun shifted his weight to his other leg. "And that probably you haven't eaten since your exam yesterday, so I made us breakfast."

Donghyuck was genuinely speechless. The thought of Renjun leaving his dorm to be with him — even when the blonde had forgotten about him the day prior — made him feel embarrassed. Guil hit Donghyuck like a truck.

When he opened his mouth to start his apologies, the grumbling of his stomach beat him; Renjun's initial offer seemed to affect his body. Both guys laughed at how _loud_ Donghyuck's stomach had protested. With that, Donghyuck agreed; they walked together to the dining table with light steps and soft smiles decorating their faces.

It was a peaceful breakfast. Donghyuck had praised Renjun's cooking skills but not without teasing the brunette for trying to food poison him, gaining a smack on the arm and a handful of insults. Donghyuck had tried his best to look cheerful by throwing some jokes or funny memories from his time in high school, to which Renjun reacted enthusiastically and even exchanged some of his stories from Jilin — both ignoring the elephant in the room.

But of course, after spending a significant amount of time together, Renjun had learned the right way to approach Donghyuck. 

Renjun shifted his weight on the chair, gaining Donghyuck's attention. He started, "Yesterday I looked for you back at the classroom after you texted me, but Yangyang told me you walked away while ignoring everyone. He looked worried," mumbled Renjun, searching for Donghyuck's eyes.

A pause.

"You got me worried too."

Donghyuck almost missed that last sentence.

"I'm sorry." Donghyuck had somehow found his voice to answer, mimicking Renjun's tone — it was barely a whisper. Donghyuck wasn’t used to admit he was having a hard time, but the softness in the way Renjun talked to him felt sincere; Donghyuck felt he didn't deserve such care.

Renjun turned to face the blonde with warmth all over his features. He grabbed Donghyuck's hand over the table and gave it a light squeeze. "Hey, it's okay. You're okay. Nothing bad happened to you, that's the most important thing."

Donghyuck couldn't look back at Renjun any longer. Those brown orbs held too much honesty; the piercing yet comforting glance made Donghyuck afraid of having an emotional breakdown at any moment. He retrieved his hand from Renjun's hold.

"Yeah, but still," Donkhyuck went silent for a moment in an attempt to organize his thoughts. He let out a sigh. "The feeling of passing out of stress hasn't left."

"Are you sure it isn't related to the candles in your room?" Renjun asked with concern. "The scent seemed a bit strong. I even got dizzy when you opened the door."

"You might be right," started Donghyuck. Now it was him who extended his hand for Renjun to take, offering the other a small smile. "Come with me to blow them off?"

They walked with their hands locked to Donghyuck's bedroom. Donghyuck saw Renjun scan through the room while they blew each candle off, looking at the few pictures the blonde had pasted on the wall. The scent of sea salt that was still lingering matched the melancholic feeling inside Donghyuck.

Once done, both guys sat on the bed, Donghyuck sat next to Renjun, and they fell into a comfortable silence. Renjun laid his back on the mattress, taking the other with him. They enjoyed each other’s company for a while, just looking at the ceiling while the music continued playing in the background. Donghyuck had lots of questions, but he couldn't find himself voicing any of them. He feared one word would shatter _this_ moment into pieces.

Renjun’s phone chimed and made the brunette sigh.

"You have to go already?” asked Donghyuck with a voice raspy and weak. Renjun hummed in agreement and sat back on the bed, fishing for his phone in his jeans pocket.

“Yeah, this guy texted me saying that the professor of Physical Chemistry will beat my ass if I don’t show my progress on the final project in class.” He lazily checked the watch on his wrist. “One that should be starting in about 15 minutes.”

Donghyuck scoffed and smiled incredulously, not believing how the Renjun he met during the semester, was being _this_ irresponsible. Renjun stood up and answered his messages, leaving Donghyuck still laying down on his mattress. After blinking the sleep out of his eyes, Donghyuck tried to get up from the bed but stopped when he felt a pair of hands cupped his face.

Standing before him, Renjun had his hands pressed over Donghyuck's cheeks while looking at his eyes with an unreadable expression. Donghyuck wasn't able to understand what the brunette was doing. For a brief moment, silence engulfed them once more until Donghyuck felt his face being slightly lifted, making sure he was looking at Renjun's eyes. 

Those brown orbs brought calm to Donghyuck's racing heart.

“Hyuck,” Renjun whispered, trying to keep the intimate moment intact. Renjun caressed slowly one of Donghyuck's cheekbone with his thumb, causing the latter to lean into the gentle touch and hum.

Donghyuck felt as if butterflies were exploring every inch of his body; tickling his insides until he felt it at the tip of his fingers. He also felt the knots on his chest went loose, only leaving serenity on his heart — calm ocean waves expanding into the depths of his heart.

No matter how many times he looked at the brunette, Donghyuck was always entranced by the unwavering gaze of Renjun's starry eyes — a Milkyway on their own. He noticed the prominence of the dark circles under Renjun's almond-shaped eyes; tiredness all over his features. Even like that, Donghyuck still thought they were beautiful.

“I will always be proud of you, no matter what," Renjun started. The sudden confession made Donghyuck raise his brows in surprise. "Never forget that, okay?” 

It just was a simple sentence, Donghyuck had to admit it, but after all the stress and uncertainty that pilled for weeks until that Saturday morning, it was the reassurance Donghyuck had unconsciously waited for. Without even noticing, he felt the lump in his throat forming again. Donghyuck wanted to say something, move from Renjun's hold and hide; but at this point, it was nearly impossible to come with a convincing excuse.

Donghyuck covered Renjun’s hands with his trembling ones. He finally allowed the burning sensation behind his eyes to create a pond on his eyes. Renjun wiped the first ghost tears with his thumbs, trying to be as careful as possible — they traced the blonde's cheeks in small droplets, stubborn to leave in bigger batches. But soon, those stray droplets became thin waterfalls falling over the bronze of Donghyuck's skin. Renjun let them flow through his palms while Donghyuck sobbed all the stress out of his body. 

Donghyuck had always wanted to be known as a reliable person. Someone independent who knew where they were standing in life, always striving for the best. His strong will allowed him to walk for miles to reach his goal, while the softness of his soul remained protected.

But that facade of strongness didn't last forever.

Seeing how uncontrollable his sobs became, Donghyuck felt Renjun got closer to him — he whispered sweet nothings into Donhyuck's ear to calm him down. He felt how the brunette moved his hands from his wet cheeks to the back of his messy bleached hair — caressing his nape with soft movements. Renjun left some small kisses at the top of Donghyuck’s head.

The blonde buried his head into Renjun’s chest while wrapping his arms around the other’s waist with a hard grip hard. Maybe Renjun already knew it, but Donghyuck was making it obvious he didn't want the brunette to leave.

After a while, when the sonorous cries became merely light sobs, the golden-haired loosed the grip of Renjun’s waist. Donghyuck tried to breathe deeply, trying to compose himself.

Donghyuck _knew_ he looked like a mess, but he couldn't bring himself to care.

"You don't have to keep up with everyone's expectations, Hyuckie." Renjun's hand traveled to the blonde's back, making circles over it. "You're allowed to fail too."

Not attempting to move and look up to meet the other's eyes, Donghyuck mumbled a small ' _Thank you, Ren._ '

“You know you count on me for everything, right?”

Noticing the quiver of the brunette's voice, Donghyuck detangled completely from Renjun's frame. The first thing Donghyuck noticed was Renjun's lips pressed into a thin line. The blonde moved his eyes to meet Renjun's.

_Oh_

They were watery, reflecting the sunlight that crept through the room's curtains — covering his long eyelashes with tiny sparkles. And then Donghyuck understood: Renjun had cried too.

His facial expression must have given his surprise because Renjun limited to chuckled lightly while moving the golden bangs away from Donghyuck's tired eyes. He placed his hands on Donghyuck's shoulders and brought him closer to plant a small kiss on the blonde's forehead.

Those lips on Donghyuck’s skin melted any remaining fear and insecurity. Renjun moved to place tender pepper kisses all over Donghyuck's face. From his puffy eyes to the tip of his nose, his cheeks — covering them while tasting the bitter flavor of salt on them. Donghyuck felt Renjun do this slowly, taking his time to make sure there wasn't any spot forgotten. Donghyuck couldn't stop the bubbling feeling inside his chest, resulting in small giggles.

The brunette finally kissed the corner of his lips and slowly set himself apart. None of them said a thing, but Donghyuck felt his heartbeat increase — a hummingbird threatening to escape out of his ribcage, exposing the flowers which blossomed out of the warmth of Renjun's presence.

Donghyuck smiled.

“Even when you hated me, you still took care of me. I must say I’m flattered, mister Huang,” Donghyuck said, half teasing. His voice on a lower pitch.

"Unfortunately," Renjun huffed with fake annoyance. "Imagine if I didn't, I would've dealt with you for another semester! I wouldn't have done it for free again, though."

They laughed until their stomach hurt.

Donghyuck couldn't believe what he heard, but at the same time, he definitely could. After all, that was their dynamic. Renjun had become someone Donghyuck got to know and cherish, even when they started with the wrong foot.

Donghyuck plopped back onto the mattress, taking Renjun with him. They laid next to each other, still holding hands. All the weight of the stress was finally taking a toll on him, but the warmth of Renjun's body and the pleasant smell of his perfume made Donghyuck realize he was at peace — Renjun was calm after the storm. His presence was like a mild blanket; Donghyuck felt safe.

"Remember that time in the library when we fought?"

Renjun hummed in response.

"And remember when you told Yangyang that, I quote, 'I wanted to kiss you so badly'?"

Donghyuck felt Renjun turned onto his side to look into the blonde's side profile. He felt a smile tugging at the corner of his lips. "I kinda wanted to do it right now."

With a trumping heart, Donghyuck turned to face Renjun. He spared one last look to the brunette's sparkly eyes, carefully moving from his face until their lips met. Donghyuck couldn’t confidently say who was the one who leaned forward first, but Renjun’s lips were brushing against his. Shyly first, asking for permission; testing the waters to know if both of them were sure of what they were doing.

Truth be told, this situation was the last Donghyuck imagined himself to be in, but he felt his body relaxing under the small pecks Renjun placed on his mouth, always tender. He felt a slight sigh escape from his lips.

Sensing him spacing out, Renjun stopped and backed a few centimeters off, looking for Donghyuck’s eyes with hesitance. “Are you okay? Should we stop?”

Donghyuck smiled softly, eyes hiding a bit. He stretched his hand to caress Renjun’s pink cheek, who melted over the touch; Renjun slightly closed his eyes.

Once again, Donghyuck couldn’t hold himself from blurting his own thoughts out loud. “Since when?” 

Renjun furrowed his brows, lost on what the blonde meant until Donghyuck pointed at his lips. The curve of Renjun's lips tilted a little, shyly.

"I've wanted to kiss you after the party," Renjun confessed, placing a hand over his neck. Donghyuck noticed how the pink tint on his cheeks expanded to his ears. "You looked fucking hot, no matter how many times I had to remind myself how much of an ass you were."

Donghyuck almost choked on air with the boldness of Renjun's words. "You weren't _that_ good of a person too!"

"Says the one who threw coffee over the sweater my _gege_ gifted me last Christmas!"

"It wasn't that pretty anyway."

Before Renjun could answer, Donghyuck moved forward and planted a small kiss at the tip of the brunette's nose, silencing Renjun. The latter wasn't able to respond, as every word ended in incoherent mumbles and frustrated cries.

Renjun placed his head in the crook of Donghyuck's neck while the blonde placed one of his arms over the other's waist, bringing him closer.

As they continued holding each other, Renjun's phone kept buzzing inside of the pocket of his jeans. It didn't matter anymore, because, in that moment of bliss and comfort, the feedback of a project that wasn't due until a couple of weeks later wasn't that important.

Renjun planted one last kiss on Donghyuck’s neck, making the latter giggle.

("Hey," called Renjun, trying to break from the heated kiss. Donghyuck grumbled making Renjun giggle with his response. The latter placed his hands on Donghyuck's chest to push him away. The couch protesting under their bodies.

Donghyuck sighed in defeat. "What?"

"We forgot to wash the dishes, and Jeno will be pissed."

"You gotta be kidding me." Donghyuck resisted the urge to roll his eyes. He pouted while looking at Renjun. "Did we really stop because you got worried about some dirty dishes?"

Before Renjun could answer, Donghyuck placed one finger over the other's lips, shushing him; they were slightly swollen and shiny. "Jeno's with Mark right now, probably sucking face the same way we were doing just a moment ago. Don't worry about it, sweetheart." Donghyuck had the nerve to smirk. "Now, where were we?"

Donghyuck cupped Renjun's cheeks and brought him close. The latter just scoffed and muttered ' _you're the worst roommate ever.'_

They closed the distance with a kiss.)  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> Comments and kudos are always appreciated :]
> 
> EDIT: Dropping my sns!! <3
> 
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